Motherhood is the journey of discovering the strength you never knew you possessed and facing the fears you never knew existed.
It’s knowing you need to fight, for yourself or your child, in ways you never imagined you would be fighting. It’s being labeled “Mama Bear”, and not as a term of endearment, by hospital staff as your child screams with each needle poke, while you hold them down, your heart shattering.
It’s seeing your child’s face puffy, a sepsis diagnosis with no energy, hasn’t eaten or taken in fluids for days, and feeling completely helpless, your heart shattering over and over.
It’s holding your head high, knowing you are advocating, you are supporting, you are loving your child, spouse, family, friend. It’s having grace with yourself as the fear creeps in but knowing that strength is sitting there, somewhat silently, waiting to be activated. It’s holding your ground, securing your values, and living by them. It’s balancing the emotions, the mental and physical load of it all. It’s not letting the darkness consume you, that’s when the truest form of strength rises, the one that keeps you fighting to continually find the light.
BUT, it’s also tickling them endlessly to hear their uncontrollable laughter. Comforting them in the middle of the night after a bad dream, or growing pains. It’s watching them grow and change into this incredible, thoughtful, caring child. It’s taking in each moment and remembering the moments that light you up, inside and out.
For our family, it’s homeschooling, teaching gardening and food preservation, caretaking of animals, cooking and cleaning, learning how to do your own laundry, how to choose health conscious foods and products for the home, and our bodies. It’s money management, including budgeting and spending your money wisely.
It’s also love, laughter, and memories filling our hearts. It’s daily gratitude, it’s an abundance of hugs and kisses, it’s an expression of love around every corner. It’s getting outside and just being. It’s drawing strength from happiness.
This is my Motherhood Journey, a love filled mess, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
Redhaven Homestead 